Dear Michelle Valentine,

I met this great guy a couple of months ago. “John” approached me when I was at a happy hour at an Irish bar downtown.

We chatted a while, and ended up staying there until the bar closed!

He asked for my phone number; and said he would call me the next day. Well, the next day turned into 4 days, but he apologized and said he travels a lot.

In the past couple of months, he’s called me only once a week, and we’ve gone out only once in these 2 months.

I haven’t dated anyone else because I really like him and we have a lot in common.

How can I casually ask him to call me more/or see him more often?

Diane

 

Dear Diane,

I do not know why you are putting your social life on hold for this untouchable “traveling man” who desires to see you but once in a time of two months!

If he was truly interested in pursuing you, he would call and see you more often… regardless of where he is in the world.

The real issue here is your desire to alter his feelings toward you… this is something you simply cannot do.

I suggest that the next time he calls you, you communicate your feelings to him to see where you stand in this situation (for example, are you just a nice friend for him to talk to when he is only on the road, or have you met him at a busy time in his career?)

If he is interested, he will certainly “get with the program”.

Occasionally a woman will tell the guy what she wants and he snaps to.

One of my girlfriends told her once-every-ten-day dinner companion that she didn’t have time for casual dinner; that her goal was a relationship. They finally got engaged!

On the other hand, if he is not as interested in you as you are in him, please get back out there in the dating scene and meet a man who truly desires being with you more often.