Dear Michelle Valentine,

My best friend and I have had a solid friendship since our sophomore year in college.

We’re both 28 years old, and have always been active in dating a lot of men, and have always shared with each other the intimate, awful details of the men we were dating.

Now ever since she started seeing this one guy, she rarely even calls me or tells me what’s going on between them!

How do I get my friend back, and the way she used to be?


Dear Jamie,

It sounds like your best friend has possibly fallen in love with this new man, and she is protecting the intimate relationship between herself and her boyfriend.

That is quite normal when a loving, adult relationship is forming.

She had told you the details of the previous men she was dating because they posed no emotional attachment to her. This new guy is someone she wants to hold on to, and she wants to hold onto him all for herself.

Be a good friend, Jamie, and let her be happy in love. She needs and wants your support.

Her not calling you anymore tells me that you are not giving her positive feedback when you do talk to her.

The next time you call her (or when she calls you), speak in an upbeat manner, and tell her how truly happy you are for her. And if you really love her as a true friend, you will mean what you say.

Keep yourself involved with other female and male friends; your time to fall in love shall come too.