Dear Michelle Valentine,
I’m in a dead- end relationship.
I’m 28, and I’ve been with this 30 year old guy for over 2 years now. Every time I bring up the notion that we should spend more time with each other, I always get “You know I work a lot,” “I need to be with my friends, too,” and “Jeez, don’t close me in.”
I really desire a loving marriage, and I want children, and even the dog in the white-picket-fenced-yard.
I love this guy, but I feel like I’m just withering away (or is it at this point, wasting away?).
I know I need to let go of him, but I’m really scared.
Marilyn, via email
Dear Marilyn,
By writing to me, you have made the first step towards committing to start seeking out a better life for yourself – one that will fulfill your wishes and dreams of having a loving, married life.
Now that you realize this man has not been as loving as you desire (and truly need) him to be, you must make the change of letting your heart go of that man that is wasting your time.
I would not consider the “arrangement” he has with you to be considered a “relationship”, and you realize that as well, so it is obvious you must move on.
It can be scary to start anew, but just think – that wonderful man of your dreams does exist, and he’s just around the corner…
and I’ll even bet he’s been dreaming of a white picket fence, too!
My ex-girlfriend I kept at arms length for a long time…she was perfect, smart, beautiful, loving, I was just not ready to settle down. She tried to break it off and had the same feelings that our relationship wasn’t going anywhere. That was a real kick in the pants. So I tried to be the best boyfriend ever but she was already done. When she decided she wanted out of ur “dead-end” relationship there was no changing her mind….if you truly love this guy maybe the idea of losing you will get him to realize what he truly would be missing…just my two cents..